16 July 2007

If you've followed my blog for a while, you'll find that I've not been very introspective in my writing. I come across as this really peaceful, nature-loving kind of person. Just kind of la de da (hence the title). In my profile, you'll find where it says, I'm not always what I seem. On the one hand, I live a life in public. I'm a busy hairdresser, and while at work, I'm surrounded by people. I'm one-on-one with my clients, and they're looking at me (in the mirror) while I work. I'm in constant conversation. I have an ongoing, progressive relationship with my clients. I really like them, and visa verse. As I've said before, it's a very rewarding job, and one in which there's immediate rewards. I never mind being at work, and am never in a bad mood there. At home, I'm really solitary. There's not a spouse to talk to. When there was one, he didn't have much to say (talk about a contrast between work and home). Thirteen-year olds do not like to spend a lot of time with their moms. So, at home, I have to keep myself occupied. I tend to get fixated on stuff. Christmas is a big one. If you didn't read me back then, you'll see come December. Fortunately, there's no house projects coming up. Being that it's summer, I'm all about being outside. I've thought to myself lately, you really have to stop talking about the garden and about birds and squirrels cause you're going to be boring. But...those things keep me occupied, and for now, they make me really happy. But, I like writing, and I like the things I like, and I like getting comments and I really like the connections I've made with the people I've met through this blog. Whew. Did I get away from talking about being introspective? I don't like to dwell on things. I like to be nice. I like to be liked. I wish I had more friends. I'm optimistic. I'm pretty happy. But serene? Not. Being a single Mom with an outspoken, opinionated daughter with a boyfriend is really hard. I get worried, and angry, and depressed, and a slew of other anxiety-ridden emotions, and I just have to find the things that make me happy. Like looking at this boy squirrel. Aren't I bad? It took me by surprise too.

Emily came home last night. We were very happy that she was home. She showed me the many-hundred pictures that she took while she was gone. She is one lucky girl to have gone on such an adventure-packed vacation. I think I'd need a vacation from that vacation. My idea of a vacation is laid back. It was a good reunion for Em and me, and we have our own vacation coming up in a few weeks.

I walked for the 5th time this week. Today was the hardest walk yet, and it felt so good when I finally got home. I think it's time to find the old pedometer so I can start setting some goals. Em walked to her boyfriend's house this morning to have breakfast with his family, and hang out. I did some stuff around here, including making another zucchini pie, and sort of didn't know what to do with myself. I decided to drive out to my Mom's and take her to the pool. She belongs to the community pool I grew up at. I'll have to take pictures. It's a beautiful place, on the grounds of what was the mansion of a famous Maryland family in colonial times. It was a very hot yet not too humid day. The pool temperature was perfect. I went off the diving board. I swam laps. I read my Wired magazine and listened to music on my MP3. I walked the edges of the pool with my mother. For those that don't know it, my mom had a terrible stroke almost 7 years ago, and she's handicapped because of it. She likes to walk in the water holding on to the edge with her one hand that 'works'. I spend whatever time I can with her to keep her company, 'cause she has a very lonely life. Anyway, my point is that the day turned out to be a great one. My neighbors invited Emily and me over for dinner. They found out I've never had shish kabob and wanted to make it for me. It was great! They made skewers of marinated shrimp, steak and chicken. The vegetable skewers had onions, peppers, mushrooms, potatoes and tomatoes. Yum. They made a Paula Dean peach cobbler for dessert. We had lively conversations through out. What a great ending. I took pictures. Of the food.

Tomorrow will be busy. Emily wants to walk with me in the morning. We're going to the high school to find out about her schedule. Then to the orthodontist. Then we're taking Em's boyfriend with us to my parent's pool. I better get to bed so I can rest up for it.


CRUSTY MOM-E said...

I know how you feel.

The food looks yummy-you liked the kabobs? what was your favorite?

Welcome home to Em,..I can't imagine what it's like having a 13 year old, not to mention having a 13 year old daughter, and doing it as a single dmom..you should pat your back-that's a very difficult thing to do!
Have a good monday.

Portia said...

i can see that you have a lot on your plate, and i appreciate that you share the positive aspects of your life with us. i started blogging as a way to vent some excess energy. then i realized there are people actaully reading my blog - and i much prefer the connection with people to the empty venting - so i try not to be overly negative. it is hard not to focus on all the things that are "wrong" but as you said, perhaps we just need something else to focus our energy on.

i'm glad it was a good day...i hope today is as well!

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

I'm sorry to learn about your mom but it is great that you are able to spend some time with her.

I enjoy reading your blog and getting to know you. I think you are a very positive person. I enjoy reading your blog so much you even have me rooting for you against the squirrels!

fiwa said...

I enjoy reading your blog, no matter what you write about.

I'm so glad for you that Emily is home. Enjoy your walk and day at the pool together.

jAMiE said...

Hi Cheryl...i totally enjoy your blog and the things you choose to write about and i love the pictures you post.

I'm sorry to hear about your mother but it's good that you get to spend time with her.

It sounds as if Emily has a pretty nifty mom... i hope you two enjoyed your walk together!

ps...the kebobs look yummy!

Amanda said...

Cheryl you are an absolutely delightful person. :)

azure said...

I really enjoy your posts about Emily, about your trips with your mom, your garden, your wildlife.

I have teenagers and elderly parents and squirrels too.

Please keep on writing about your life.

Anonymous said...

I'm certainly glad we've met through blogging! It's important to find a balance that you are comfortable with, both in life and in posting on a public blog.

It seems to me you have a good relationship with Em. I had a role reversal with my own mom. In many respects she became the daughter nnd I became the mother. She dilligently went to work everyday and I managed the house and we worked on our finanical struggles to survive together, that is why I got a job at thirteen. I worked in a pizza joint four hours a night as the "industrial cheese grater". I'll always be grateful for having had that job. It's too bad single parents can't get more support with such things though, Child support is often not enough, and it doesn't adjust to the rate of inflation.

You're doing just fine. And I'm not sure which of you is dirtier at the moment, the squirrel, or you for taking the picture. ha,ha,ha ;>


Cheryl said...

crustybeef...Now I know what people mean when they say to their kids: you just wait! I don't know what part of the kebobs I liked the best. I love food!

portia...You're right about focusing on the positive. I couldn't go through life otherwise.

LGS...Thank you. And, I think of you whenever I write about squirrels.

fiwa...Thanks for saying that! Funny...Em didn't walk, and we didn't go to the pool. The best laid plans...

jamie...I'm constantly surprised that I'm still writing. It's a good outlet for me.

amanda...I don't know if anyone's ever called me delightful before. I'm very thankful for the compliment.

azure...Thanks for visiting! I'll stop by and say a hello.

proxima...I work on improving my relationship with Emily every day. I think it might be a good idea for me to tell her that. Maybe she'd take my cue?

Lynx217 said...

Don't you worry about what we think, we're the audience, you're the writer, we read what you write. And if we didn't enjoy it, we wouldn't read it. Unless - like stupid idiot me - we lose our main way to connect to the outside world!! Oh well, hopefully that'll be remedied in a few days, much to the grunt of the man for sure as I'll surely spend one night just re-falling in luv with a wifi pda! LOL. I apologize for my silence but with my pda wifi card gone, a lil case of the blues, and feeling icky like I'm going to get that cold the man's got, I've not been sociable! I hope you get to enjoy the summer, from one shy outdoorsy chick to another!

Neponset River Bridge Dig said...

You do have to take care of #1 and that's you for without doing so there will be no you.

Your daughter needs you to do things that make YOU happy this will only set a good example for her.

and being married is way over rated anyway. :))

Esmerelda said...

I love your ladeda.

I wish I could be so content.


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